The following are remarks given at the May 2024 Commencement of the MFA Program at Queens University of Charlotte:

In general, I don’t like giving speeches. Giving a speech requires standing in front of a group of people while they stare at you… and it also requires talking. I’m a writer. I like to write stuff for other people to say.

And this speech especially is the speech I didn’t want to give. Why? Because I feel wildly unqualified to give you advice. There’s no wisdom here, no silver bullet. No one thing that will bring into focus everything you’ve learned at Queens, and everything you’ve learned before Queens, where you might say “That’s it. I’ve been waiting for someone to say this very thing.” Well that’s just not going to happen.

All I have to offer you are my own stories and experiences. My hope is that maybe you’ll find some useful advice in these brief anecdotes. If not, then I owe you five minutes of your life back. Let’s pretend we’re having a fireside chat… but in May… in Charlotte. Who cares that it’s 90° outside. Anything’s possible, it’s Hollywood after all.

I’ll begin with this: Always take the meeting…

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